Sunday, January 27, 2013
Have you ever been over someones house and it looks like a tornado just flew through? And we're not talking about a mess that is made from general living and the person just hasn't gotten around to doing the chores. This mess I'm speaking of could easily be highlighted on the next episode of "Hoarders"! Things everywhere...bulging boxes stacked atop one another; bags full of 'needful' things strewn about; mountains of clothes pile high creating an obstacle course the envy of even a Tough Mudder competition. Every conceivable surface has something on it. Standing still is your best option because the thought of navigation breaks you out in a cold sweat.
Now the chaos is not isolated to things. There could be a gang of unkempt kids tussling about oblivious to their third world conditions. They are busy screaming about who touched who as if personal space is a holy sanctum. Let's throw in a few pets for good measure creating the look of the food chain: a couple mange dogs fighting over a sock, a fat cat lounging on top of the fridge, an unknown number of hamsters in a habitat that looks and smells like a trash heap, a lone goldfish in a bowl where the water has evaporated so much he can barely swim about, and who could do without some sort of reptile? An iguana, tucked away in a corner with a heat lamp warming his sanctuary protected from the clutter by a thin layer of glass. (I think a bird would be over the top...don't you?)
Then there is the noise! Why is the TV and Pandora blaring? Sounds are rising and falling in fierce competition so that the alpha can be heard. Suddenly above everything, the head of the house, clearly the one responsible for establishing this environment yells out in an authoritarian query of control,
"WHO LEFT THE IRONING BOARD OUT?!!!"
This applies to how some people think and react in confrontation. Avoiding the obvious. Instead zeroing in on a fatal flaw of yours. A passage from the bible describes it well.
"Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye."
Let us be mindful to keep our own affairs in order before we are quick to point out another person's shortcomings. Then we will have the clarity to help one another.
Friday, January 25, 2013
"You over think" "You're crazy" "You're bringing that on yourself" "That's all in your head" "You're the problem" "You don't know what you're talking about" "you're exhausting"
Do people really know the power in words?
You can build up or tear down.
I'm waging war against negative verbiage! I know I don't like to be deflated with destructive words. So in the like way I do not need to use language negatively towards others.
"Be the change you wish to see in the world"-Gandhi
That is my charge.
This sign was posted in one of the classrooms at school and really moved me!
Thursday, January 24, 2013
The age old dilemma of relationships. The reason Shakespeare and the bible are timeless. There is nothing new under the sun.
"People stuff" I call it. The ebb and flow of human interaction. I may rely on intuition where my counterpart relies on logic. Where is the common ground? There is so much that is not said and expected to be understood and then there are times things are said and no understanding can be reached. We are a troublesome lot.
I'm probably putting all my eggs in one basket here....but I heavily rely on my best friend for mental comfort. However not being the emotional type their response is more of distance and lack of interest for all things charged emotionally. So I'm left misunderstood and frustrated. I'm supposed to know they are not emotional and they are supposed to know I am emotional....yeah, good luck with that one.
Today was a challenge. Nothing too hard....just a bit of a reality check. I had my first of many doctors visits to begin the process of the embryo transfer for my step-sister. Although I am ready physically, mentally, and spiritually....and excited to offer myself in this way, I had to take a moment to digest the upcoming calender. Having gone through this before there is definitely a certain understanding of how the process will go. But when I looked at the calender of medications I am to start taking, I was instantly flooded with memories of painful injections and hormonal mood swings!
My life will now be in the hands of a team of doctors mapping out my every move. Coupled with my step-sister there every step of the way rising and falling to the occasion of every appointment. Yes, I was hit with the reality of things being well under way. So whatever I needed to do to be ready...had to be done already!
Like I said, I just needed to take a moment....and here it is.
Wednesday, January 23, 2013
Early morning...can't sleep. The first place to gravitate when this happens is the art studio.
There has been a recent surge of creative energy pulsating throughout the studio. Projects that had been lovingly started and quietly abandoned are now receiving the TLC they desperately deserve. Many projects have already been finished, delivered and checked off their prospective lists. The current group of art being worked on brings me JOY! I wanted to get to it long ago but my crazy OCD mind works in specific ways....
I needed to visually finish some of the smaller projects and commissions. Pieces of work that were not as personal in nature but more for the client. Clear out the clutter visually and in my head so the flow of creativity can freely channel through me during these more demanding pieces.
I'm EXCITED! My current work embodies the combination of different mediums and concepts. A long time I had yearned to produce work that took into account the many facets of my creative interests. Rich layers of ideas flow over the canvas melding with materials effortlessly executed. There is realism, abstraction, fantasy mixed with paints, paper, cloth, 3 dimensional elements and anything within my grasp that fits to get the point across all living harmoniously on one surface. Finally a place of creation that mirrors the plethora of options that swirl inside of me. Just as the play on canvas consists of multiple layers emerging and hiding, bold in some places yet subtle in others, full of energy and life so is my own personality represented. I feel confident this current body of work displays closely where I am as an artist. There is depth. It is well worth further investigation....I shall learn more about myself and others in the process.
Art is life...
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
It IS possible to live in the moment AND plan my future without losing my free spirit in the process. So here goes... The following is a list of adventures I will undertake in 2013.
January: Begin the exciting journey of becoming a surrogate for my step-sister. Currently she has two frozen embryos waiting to enter my womb.
January til December: Apply to UCONN for graduate school. Proposed entry September 2014. Need: Application, Artist Statement, transcripts, standardized graduate test, financial application and portfolio review.
March: Heart of Montessori art show (first ever). Showing student art work since September 2012 from the classes I taught.
May: MSGH (Montessori School of Greater Hartford) Gala video - produce and edit, Donation of artwork I created and a donation of three free art lessons to auction off at the Gala .
Saturdays: Teach private lessons for students at Artpeace Studio.
Dream/Goal for the year: Personal art show at a local gallery.
Upgrade Artpeace Studio: Revamp website, updated business cards, organize digital files, network digital files, update resume, and gain remote access to digital archive (examples of artwork)
At first glance the list for 2013 appears overwhelming, however as I live in the moment, when real change happens, it becomes clear I am already equipped with everything needed to accomplish my goals.