Tuesday, January 19, 2016

Where am I today?

art heals...
     Once again, 2 a.m. is the bewitching hour. Silence wraps around me like a warm blanket. Subtle noises throughout my space creates a comforting familiarity....from the soft hum of my favored neon peace sign....the gentle rhythmic mechanical cooling fan of my laptop....to the deep throaty moan of the hidden furnace, I am at ease. This is MY time to reflect and create. While the world sleeps, I am wide awake in mind, body and spirit.

     I spent the past two mornings fully engulfed in research. Freddie Grey, Trayvon Martin, Emmett Till, Frederick Jermaine Carter, and Laquan McDonald are my recent honorees. All young Black men. The names I investigated started as a mild curiosity then exploded into an all encompassing absorption of personal narratives and history. Thankfully the media is the culprit. From the time I witnessed the video of Eric Gardner being choke out to death for the world to see I have been trying to somehow make sense of inhumanity. Questions swarm in my mind. How is life truly valued in these moments in history? A jumble of created mental equations topple each other. Just as I am horrible at math...I don't get it! The most precious means of passing on our DNA and legacy is often so easily snuffed out as if life is expendable because of fear or misunderstanding. In my mind, there is no acceptable justification to steal a life, but then, I am an idealist.

     I am plagued with a new mission in my art. For the past year and a half I have heightened senses concerning humanity. I personally feel the pain and injustice of victims of violence. It can be tough at times, seeing, reading and hearing about so much negativity, discrimination and abuse. It is bound to have a profound affect on my day. Hot tears stream my face regularly as I remain vulnerable to the countless accounts of known and unknown names recklessly killed. However, I believe I am somehow personally healing through the horrific deaths of so many taken too soon. Their life and death become my platform to fight against injustice. Through my art I am able to speak a language when words fail me. 

     There is something deep within me that cries out in outrage against oppressive means. One looking in could easily say that because I am Black or African American or simply of African decent it is obvious that I'd be sensitive to the plight of my people. I, however, know "there are layers to this thing" (Freedom) Injustice and oppression are not exclusive to the black community. As a woman artist I feel a double portion of a different kind of discrimination. Had I been Greek in 336 – 323 BC  (Hellenistic Period) I'd be considered a hero.

     The Black community is my focus because we need the most support and healing. In 2016 we are still recovering from generations of oppression. The affects of slavery did not just dissipate. We feel all too real the residual affects of mis-education and lack. Our communities are diseased with self-hate and hopelessness. PTSD is real! (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder)

     My goal and mission is to become a beacon of light.... of hope. When we understand and accept our full story (starting in Africa, BEFORE slavery) we will see our greatness and feel the generations of love, honor and dignity transcend time and space. My art is focused on education and uplifting black consciousness to encourage living out our full potential and capacity. With love as the standard, I pray we are all encouraged to value human life.