Saturday, October 27, 2012

"God's gonna trouble the waters..."

 The calm and stillness of the hour make it possible for ideas to flow like water. My body can't help but to rise at four a.m. and today I did not fight it.  It is dark outside and nothing is stirring in the house however if you listen carefully, you can hear the house breathe. Its a peaceful ebb and flow permeating throughout these walls. I'm sitting in what used to be the children's playroom but now is the newly transformed "adult" living room. The colors and decor wrap around me like a chenille comforter. For a snack to nibble on I prepared red grapes, butter crackers, jalapeno infused sharp cheddar cheese and senna tea. Sade is floating in the air blessing my quiet time with her smooth like melted butter voice. I am at peace.

  Just as ripples in a pond start small, pick up momentum and expand as far as the body of water will carry, I too have a stirring going on.  There is peace all around me and yet inside me ideas are dropping into the ocean of my mind creating an energy radiating out into the universe.  Post-year of silence has created in me a marked change in how I navigate the earth. Where I once was very vocal on a whole host of topics, I learned that my opinion is my opinion no matter if it is said out loud or not. So I spent the majority of this year observing and listening to people. Reserving the right to weigh in on any topic for the individuals that requested such oration. This has nurtured along deeper relations with old friends and even gave birth to the emergence of fresh new friends.  Although I thoroughly enjoy this type of interaction, I kind of pulled so far back from verbal expression I stopped writing as well. The stirring inside me is looking for balance.

  Things are beginning to settle out for me at home.  The twins are growing beautifully and thriving. Stacy is finally reaping the comforts for his home from sowing so many overworked overtime hours. My best friend is so comfortable with me I am almost invisibly transparent.  My art studio is heaven on earth and I effortlessly landed a part-time teaching gig at my kids school...teaching art no less! All is right with the universe. However....

 Now my spirit is calling out from the depths of my soul ready to say something.
-be in the moment
-do art
-listen first
-eat, pray, love
-make others smile
-be unpredictable
-use words sparingly...but use them
-live out loud
-be gentle (I haven't gotten that one down
-falling into a routine is extremely over-rated!

It is time for my small ripples of ideas to turn into a tsunami on the other side of the world!

This post is in loving memory of my beloved daughter Egypt Diarra-Kai
September 22, 1998 - October 27, 1998
I love you with my soul.

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